Terms Abroad – Faux University

Is it for you?

Have you ever wondered what it's like to live or study in a foreign country? Ever wanted to see the world? Need to get out of Smith Town? If you answered “maybe” to any of these questions, or were even slightly confused by them, the Terms Abroad department may be able to help you or confuse you even more!

What about foreigners?

Many of our students have never had previous travel opportunities. This often results in misconceptions about foreigners which they have learned from popular media, government statistics, diagrams found on bathroom stalls, relatives, or other unreliable sources. So we've put together a few facts to help clarify the foreigner situation and start you on the right track to begin thinking about a term abroad.

- Foreigners are dirty and carry disease: True!

It's not always completely their fault, as they have often not been raised with proper American values or indoor plumbing. Just try to tolerate it and not touch them, or let them touch you, if you can help it. If you must or would like to be in contact with them then be sure to take protective measures and precautions. Also, if traveling in Europe be sure to carry alcohol wipes to wipe your cheeks after those creepy hellos where they kiss you. I mean... Eeewwww! Always remember, it's perfectly acceptable to ask them not to touch you. That would help protect you at the time and also be instructive for them in future dealings.

- Many foreigners lack the common decency to converse with you in English: True!

This is something you may or may not have to deal with depending on your chosen travel spot. Often the situation can be successfully handled by speaking more slowly and very loudly to better enable them to comprehend simple English. While they lack the language skills to say so, we are sure most foreigners are thankful for you taking the time to try and teach them how to communicate properly.

- I won't be able to happily meet my eating and shopping needs: No! False!

Rest assured that American business interests such as McDonalds, Starbucks, and Walmart are hard at work in foreign markets trying to facilitate the homogenization and ubiquity of products and services which Americans have come to know and expect in our own country. Thankfully, there are already many places you can go and feel completely at home by being able to find all those familiar products and services which you grew up with.

- Foreigners don't like Americans: Completely False!

Americans are great! We know this and so do other right thinking individuals, even foreigners. They all owe us a lot you know. Occasionally you may meet a foreigner on your travels who does not like Americans. This is usually because they are either jealous or they hate our freedom and way of life. If you do meet such people, they should be regarded with suspicion and reported to the nearest American Embassy. Do not report them to local authorities as they are often staffed entirely by foreigners themselves and are greatly incompetent in such matters.

Is travel safe?

If you are concerned about your safety, rest assured that your concerns are completely valid. Foreign travel has become increasingly dangerous and we applaud students that plan to travel in other countries regardless. Further, we find that the kind of student insightful enough to ask such probing questions is all the more likely to succeed in a term abroad. So, good for you! Be sure to call or write today for an appointment or program application!

Continue to page 2